By its very definition, a divorce will bring huge changes to your family dynamic. You and your spouse, obviously, won’t be as close, and in some cases, the relationship with your children will hit a stumbling block as well.
There’s a chance that custody decisions won’t work out in your favor, says OK divorce attorneys Strange Law Firm. In such cases, it’s possible that you’ll become something of a secondary parent, and the connection you once had with your children may fade, particularly during and directly after your divorce.
Thankfully, though, there are some ways to stay in your childrens’ lives and rekindle your parental relationship down the line. Here are a few things to keep in mind about reconnecting with your children, even though you are no longer married to your ex.
Start By Making an Effort
In some cases where the connection between parent and child is lost, it’s because that parent didn’t make enough of a push to keep said connection alive. To avoid this, you should do everything that you can to stay active and engaged in your child’s life.
Ask about how they are doing in school, get to know their favorite shows and music, find out what activities they like to participate in for enjoyment, and learn about what else is going on in their everyday life that you can support them in — as a good parent should.
Beyond that, though, you should make an effort to learn about any emotional stress that your divorce may have wrought upon your child. It’s easy for an event like that to cause some trauma, so you’ll want to find out about any potential stress and do what you can to alleviate it by talking and explaining things.
Connect Through Hobbies
Sometimes, the simple things are the best things to bond over. Your child has hobbies, naturally, and you can use some of these hobbies as a chance to grow closer.
Certainly, there are some hobbies that your child will want to indulge in alone, but through conversation you can suggest some “team” activities you can try, and schedule some time that the both of you can agree upon.
Remember to Exercise Kindness
Your divorce may have been a traumatizing experience for you as well, and there’s a good chance you might still have bitter feelings toward your ex. For the sake of your relationship with your child, though, it’s best not to act out negatively because of those feelings. Be forgiving, and stay cordial in your interactions with your ex for the good of your child.